Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(213): View more from California

I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.

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(804): View more from Virginia

Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here

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(860): View more from Connecticut

im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story

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(210): View more from Texas

I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.

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25 People Didn’t Realize They Were Talking To Someone Famous
Read it at the TFLN blog
(724): View more from Pennsylvania

An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.

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(336): View more from North Carolina

Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye

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(573): View more from Missouri

I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life

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(239): View more from Florida

I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up

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