Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
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