I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Randomize
