used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
