dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
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Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
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It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
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