Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
Randomize
