Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Randomize
