I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.