Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
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