we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize