Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
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Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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