yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Randomize
