I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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