There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
Randomize
