I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
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