Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
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