Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
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