Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends