Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
