Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
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