At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
Randomize
