my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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