i was rollin on her like bob the builder
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
Randomize
