Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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