I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
Randomize
