Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
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