I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die