Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Randomize