suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
31 People Admit To Nasty Things They Do On The Reg
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
21 Of The Most Regrettable Tattoo Ideas Ever
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes