I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
