3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
