She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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