To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize