I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
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