I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
