Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize