do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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