Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
