So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
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maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
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WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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