some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
