i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Randomize