Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
