woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
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