I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
Thank you for not boning my boss.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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