my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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