I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
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