I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
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