i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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