ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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