I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Idk if I want to put a bra on
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